How to Monitor Your Child’s Phone and Teach Them Healthy Tech Habits

Having a phone means security and increased independence for kids, but it also brings up the issue of your child’s screen time and online safety. Some operating systems (OS) have built-in parental controls but may lack the features parents want. Free and paid parental control apps exist, but you may not know what’s good versus dangerous.

Striking the balance between encouraging healthy habits and freedom is tricky. However, many helpful tools and resources are available, including the best parental control apps on the market. If your goal is to monitor your child’s phone the most effectively, keep reading for our full guide.

How to monitor your child’s phone usage

There are various ways to monitor your child’s phone usage. Apple has built-in settings, while Google Family Link allows you to set up controls for free. Each allows you to set rules, screen time limits, content filters, web filtering, and other usage factors. However, they don’t offer some advanced features (like alerts for identity theft or online predators), which some parents may want.

Good parental controls can send you content alerts that let you know if your child is talking about or engaging with self-harm content, as well as child predators, groomers, cyberbullying, and other concerning things that happen online.

A lot of control apps also offer location tracking. You’ll be able to monitor your child’s location and set alerts if your child leaves that area.

The aim of the best parental control apps is for your child to grow up safe and happy in a world full of tech. A big part of that includes your child’s digital life and teaching them good habits. To help with this, a lot of apps even encourage conversations with your family to discuss the importance of healthy tech habits with your kids.

Can I use the iOS or Android parental controls?

While you can use these settings, some aspects may be lacking. Both iOS and Google Family Link offer controls for screen time limits, app restrictions, download restrictions, location services, and more. This is a solid foundation for keeping your child safe.

However, if you want alerts for your child’s activities, such as self-harm language, cyberbullying, moving to different locations, sexual predators, and more, you’ll need a parental control app.

Best parental control apps to monitor your child’s phone usage

Aura: Aura is a trusted name in identity theft protection and extends all its knowledge to its parental controls. Aura can be installed on multiple devices and uses your child’s birthday to suggest filters for internet content.

Get Aura Parental Controls | Read our Aura Parental Control Review

Bark: Bark offers a lot in the realm of features. Not only does it give parents the option to buy a phone from Bark with its software pre-installed, but it also uses machine learning to alert parents to key words that can indicate self-harm talk, cyberbullying, and predators.

Get Bark Parental Controls | Read our Bark Parental Control Review

Norton Family: Norton Family is available on its own or as a bundle with other Norton products. Parents concerned with cybersecurity, identity theft, or who are in need of extra cloud storage can purchase a Norton subscription that includes Family for parental controls, or it can be used on its own to keep kids safe.

Get Norton Family | Read our Norton Family Review

Qustodio: Qustodio is one of the few parental controls that offers some features for free. If you want to upgrade to a more robust product, it offers two plans with varying features. Neither plan is too expensive, so parents can have peace of mind even with a tight budget.

Get Qustodio | Read our Qustodio Review

Why you should be monitoring your child online

The internet can be friendly to kids, supplementing education and teaching them new skills they’d never have encountered before (think learning to sew your clothes or finding science experiments you can do at home). It can also be a very adult place that children aren’t ready to view.

You’ll want to monitor what content reaches your child to shield them from harm and foster conversations about what is and isn’t healthy. Kids question the world around them, and you’ll find it easier to answer those questions (and supply some of your own) by understanding what they’re seeing.

Essential monitoring features

To fully engage with your child’s online world, you’ll need several essential monitoring features. These help divert inappropriate content from their devices and give you insight into their habits and usage.

Essential features include social media tools, web filtering, real-world location, and more. You can allow your kids to flex their autonomy while teaching them about responsible phone usage. These following features are important when you’re seeking to monitor your kid’s phone usage.

Web filtering

Whether you want to filter specific keywords and sites or want a blanket content rating system, you’ll find different versions of web filtering on different platforms. Most parental control apps will allow you to set a general content rating based on age and filter out web content that isn’t safe for that group.

Other forms of web content filtering include blocking specific keywords and sites, a standard feature in most of these services. It can also be set up through your router. Some routers allow you to configure different filters that help keep unwanted content blocked across all devices.

Call and messenger filtering

This more advanced feature consists of filtering who can call and message your child. There are ways to filter calls from the built-in software on your phone, but extending that to third-party apps like Facebook Messenger is more difficult.

Facebook Messenger has message filtering built in. This gives you the ability to regulate who can contact your child, but we still recommend manually monitoring the messages regularly.

The alerts offered by some different parental control apps can give you greater insight into your child’s activities and who they’re talking with. This gives you more warning if your child is getting involved in something they shouldn’t and provides a much bigger safety net than the in-built filters can.

App restrictions

App restrictions are harder to enforce, especially if you have a tech-savvy kid who can disable or work around your configurations. Most phones have a feature that requires parental permission before downloading apps, but kids have found workarounds, especially with Apple’s Family Sharing feature.

Parental control apps have more restrictions you can set and are a lot more reliable than built-in solutions.

However, be careful you don’t overdo the restrictions. We don’t recommend the use of invasive spy apps to manage or track what your child is viewing online.

Time limits

This is one of the most common features available. You can set restrictions for certain apps and overall phone usage, set blackout times, and designate safe people who can always be contacted even if the time limits are up.

Disabling all other apps and allowing access to education resources are great ways to teach your child about screen time management and prioritizing learning. There are many ways to customize time limits to create a workable schedule.

Location tracking

Apple and Android both offer location-tracking services. Some parental control apps allow you to set location notifications to tell you if a child leaves an approved radius. This helps parents feel more confident while their children exert some independence. It can also help you find a lost device.

How to set up a parental control app

Getting parental control apps set up correctly will ensure your child is protected and nothing unwanted is getting through. Before starting, you should read the tutorial on your chosen service, even if they are the controls included for free on your child’s OS.

Here’s a guide on setting up one of our recommended apps, Bark.

To set up Bark on your child’s device:

1. Sign up for your free trial
2. Download the app
3. Create profiles for each child under 18
4. Connect your child’s email, social media, and devices by following the instructions in the app
5. Enter your credit card information to verify your identity (and to charge you once your trial is up)
6. Choose who gets alerts
7. Follow the instructions in the app to set up each feature

Features you should activate immediately:

• Block inappropriate websites/set an age category for your child
• Block unwanted apps
• Schedule downtime and screen time limits
• Set social media permissions
• Set alerts
• Set contacts
• Activate your parent dashboard
• Set up identity theft protections if available

How to choose the best parental control software

When you’re looking for a parental control app, there are several factors you need to consider to make sure you’re getting the best one.

Since the best software for you depends on your specific needs, here are some things to look at when you need an app to monitor your kids’ phone usage.

• Your child’s age — The amount of supervision your child requires depends on their age. A younger child may require more feature-rich parental apps that help with screen time management, allow for blocking apps, and have real-time alerts.
• Ease of use — If you’re not very tech-literate, you should consider parental control software that is easier to set up. For example, Bark offers a phone with controls already installed and configured.
• Budget — The cost of parental control apps varies between different plans. Consider how many features you need and compare products so you only pay for what you need.
• Multiple devices — Kids have multiple devices these days, so you’ll want a service that allows you to set permissions for all of them. Most parental control apps let you set the permissions for each child rather than each device. This means you won’t have to worry about reconfiguring your settings whenever a device updates or changes.

Other ways to keep your child safe online

Even if you have a tight lock on your kids’ devices, there are still other unsafe online activities to which adults regularly fall prey. Teaching your kids about cybersecurity, online safety, and online hygiene can help them spot a scam or a spammer. Online education topics to consider:

• Discuss online hygiene — Make sure to have conversations with your child about the importance of online safety and the dangers present on the internet.
• Use a password manager — Using a password manager makes it easier to keep track of passwords and generate strong ones. This will keep your child’s online accounts safe.
• Watch for identity theft — Know the signs of identity theft and monitor your child’s data for potential thieves.
• Learn about phishing scams — Kids are susceptible to phishing scams, too, especially if they play online games such as Fortnite. Teach your child about phishing scams to keep them safe.
• Use secure websites — Teach your child how to tell if a website is secure and make sure the sites they visit are legitimate and safe.
• Disable location services for live sites — Some sites request your location even though they don’t need it. Make sure your child knows not to approve location requests from websites.
• Enable two-factor authentication (2FA), multifactor authentication (MFA), and biometric authentication (FaceTime, etc) whenever possible.

FAQs

Bottom line

Keeping track of how your child uses their phone can help them develop healthy habits and avoid inappropriate content. Whether you use the built-in controls or get expanded features with the best parental control apps available, you can help your kids learn appropriate phone etiquette and usage.

Remember, it’s always a good idea to talk with your kids about technology, how to use it safely, and when to unplug.